In today's post (also my first post here on blogger) i will be talking about my best friend Ashley (you may have read her awesome blog
http://andeerose.blogspot.com/) she has been a good friend of mine ever since i came to Spring Hill in December of 2007. in the last six months, we have been buddies, close friends, together in a relationship and broken apart two months later. through everything we have been through, we still remain friends. never in my life have i ever met anybody so caring, open and optimistic. She has tried helping me so much, but all I've ever done was push her away and make bad decisions and end up hurting her. thats all i've done to her was cause her pain. all she did was try to help and never gave up on me. you're probably thinking "what the hell is wrong with you? how could you do this to her?" I've realized all the pain i have caused her. The only person that's ever cared about me, and I ended up pushing her away with bad decisions. As I sit here at my computer, I think about all that I did, and I feel like the worst friend ever. I would like to change. To be a good friend. I am going to try my best to better myself and for not to have her watch me throw my life away. I would like to start to change today, but I realized something- How can I have her believe me that I've quit. In the past I promised her that I would quit, but never did. Only for the two months that we dated, i quit. after the breakup, i became very depressed and picked up smoking once again, and since then, I've been smoking my life away and crying myself to sleep every night whenever I'm not up thinking of what reasons I have to be alive. I have a reason to live. That reason is the friends I have and her, the only one that's been there for me from the start. Other than a healthier lifestyle, She and my friends that care about me are my reason for quitting. She hasn't given up on me, so I should try harder for her.
About Me
- jasonstjohn92
- my name is Jason. im 15. im into music, hanging out with friends, do anything with computers and talk to people. i am new to blogger. my good friend Ashley inspired me to start a blog. it wont be as good as hers, but its my blog. enjoy.
2 comments:
One word.... wow! I never knew you felt that strongly towards me or anything like that. If you really mean all of that, then I can't imagine how far you'll really go. With all you said, the sky is your only limit!
Best Friends don't leave you because you smoke dude. They leave because you have become self centered. You need to stop the self punishment!! The only one you are hurting is you. Who wants to be around a person who is
such a downer or should I say whinener. Do something that you respect. The world is full of choices. Do something that you can be proud of like rebuilding computers or learning all you can about computer software. You can't get ahead by hanging out with the wrong friends. What about your family are they so against you? Sounds like you blame yourself for a lot of things. Well maybe its not all your fault. But the people that care about you don't like to see you hurting your self. Maybe they are telling you things that you don't want to hear. Stop the self-distruction you don't deserve it. You are your own worst enemy. If you were doing things that were good for you do think you would be having the trouble that you are having? Really?
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